Backpackin' With K.D.

Monday, May 16, 2011 Posted by Kyle Mountain
UFO's, Stonehenge, Atlantis, the ending of LOST - these are some of the world's most perplexing mysteries. While the vast majority of man has accepted the fact that many of these mysteries will never be solved, man's quest for answers still persists, and perhaps always will, because such efforts are never in vain if an answer is out there. Many who seek such answers are well aware of the joy, relief, and awe that are spawned if their efforts are rewarded, and such joy is being experienced first hand this very second because one of these answers has recently been discovered. Thanks to those who dared to ask the hard questions and struggle through grueling amounts of research, speculation and frustration, we now know the contents of Kevin Durant's backpack.

Conspiracy theorists have speculated about the bag's purpose for some time now, and their speculations were as diverse as those who suggested them. Some say there was a parachute inside. Some said he carried his team in it. Others thought he just carried Nate Robinson around in it. I personally thought he kept either the hopes and dreams of Seattle basketball fans or Delonte West and Gilbert Arenas' firearms. However, all such conspiracies have been laid to rest because Durant spilled the beans on what's in the pack. Apparently he keeps his iPad, headphones, Bible, and phone chargers in the bag. So, now that the bag's mundane and boring contents are well-known, one question remains: why does he carry it around? I'll tell you why, and the reason is genius - but first, I need to explain something:

In our society, mothers seem to have obtained the responsibility of being the dividing barriers which separate good from bad, proper from improper, and nice from not nice. For example, many people say you should never be hanging around with a girl that you wouldn't bring home to Mom. Or, that you should never say anything that you wouldn't say in front of your Mom. My Mom happens to have a very keen sense of what is acceptable and unacceptable, so it's no surprise that KD is one of her favorite athletes. Ask her why and she'll say it's because he's a, "nice boy." I can't speak for every Mom out there, but I think it's safe to say that most Mom's like "nice boys." (By the way, that picture is supposed to be a nice boy... I guess...) I asked my Mom what makes a, "nice boy," and some of the qualifications are: 1) players that keep their mouth's shut, 2) players that keep showboating to a minimum, 3) players that do their job, 4) players that put the team before themselves, and of course 5) players that produce. There are still athletes who attain such qualities, which is why my Mom also loves guys like Jameer Nelson, Placido Polanco, and Larry Fitzgerald. At the same time, we're constantly plagued by players who severely lack these qualities, which is why my Mom can't stand guys like LeBron James, Paul Pierce, and Brett Favre. You might be asking where I'm going with this, and that's where the backpack comes back into play.

I think the backpack is absolute genius. When we see a maturing sports star, we're used to seeing a steady progression towards conceit and arrogance that grows right alongside their growing talent and fame. We've seen Kevin Durant grow and mature immensely on the court over the last couple years, however you wouldn't know it by watching him in a press conference. In fact, you'd think he got lost on his way to math class, especially if he's accompanied by a spectacle-donning Russell Westbrook. As I said before, we're used to athletes becoming more and more cocky and arrogant as their fame grows, however I'm not seeing this with KD. Based on the way he plays, the numbers he puts up, and the money he earns, he could easily get away with being one of the cockiest guys in the league, but he's not. He's about as humble as they come. He's respectful, he smiles, he takes blame when he or his team underachieves, and when he plays spectacular he credits the team. No excuses, no ego - nothing but respect and class, and I think that's exactly why he carries the backpack. It's for the image he's portraying. People look at him, especially when he looks like a nerdy high schooler with his backpack on, and they see a non-threatening kid who just loves to play basketball, and I think that's exactly that he wants them to think. This is why my Mom loves the guy. I mean, have you ever seen Chris Pronger in a press conference? (If you answered no to this question, please click here.) Being a Philly sports fan I love Chris Pronger, and I always find it entertaining when he talks to the media. However, many people dislike the guy because he can be a jerk to the media, and while that isn't always the case it certainly does happen from time to time. Plenty of guys will pull moves like this which isn't the worst thing in the world, but it's always refreshing to see a world class athlete who's extremely humble, genuine, sincere and polite. Plus, when my Mom sees him being interviewed with his backpack buckled across his chest she thinks it's, "absolutely adorable." Not sure that's what he's going for but if he is he's doing a great job.

My Mom and I always joke about how one of these days we're going to find out that KD has been involved in gambling, drug and sex scandals, but until then I'm going to enjoy the guy because at the moment he's one of the most likable guys in sports. And although he supposedly revealed what's in his backpack, I don't think we'll ever know for sure, and I know that because the thing is always buckled up across his chest. I didn't think there was a single person in the world who actually used that buckle, but KD proved me wrong. Looks like the guys got something to hide if he's using that buckle, right? Or maybe he's just cautious - safety first!



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Monday, May 16, 2011

Backpackin' With K.D.

UFO's, Stonehenge, Atlantis, the ending of LOST - these are some of the world's most perplexing mysteries. While the vast majority of man has accepted the fact that many of these mysteries will never be solved, man's quest for answers still persists, and perhaps always will, because such efforts are never in vain if an answer is out there. Many who seek such answers are well aware of the joy, relief, and awe that are spawned if their efforts are rewarded, and such joy is being experienced first hand this very second because one of these answers has recently been discovered. Thanks to those who dared to ask the hard questions and struggle through grueling amounts of research, speculation and frustration, we now know the contents of Kevin Durant's backpack.

Conspiracy theorists have speculated about the bag's purpose for some time now, and their speculations were as diverse as those who suggested them. Some say there was a parachute inside. Some said he carried his team in it. Others thought he just carried Nate Robinson around in it. I personally thought he kept either the hopes and dreams of Seattle basketball fans or Delonte West and Gilbert Arenas' firearms. However, all such conspiracies have been laid to rest because Durant spilled the beans on what's in the pack. Apparently he keeps his iPad, headphones, Bible, and phone chargers in the bag. So, now that the bag's mundane and boring contents are well-known, one question remains: why does he carry it around? I'll tell you why, and the reason is genius - but first, I need to explain something:

In our society, mothers seem to have obtained the responsibility of being the dividing barriers which separate good from bad, proper from improper, and nice from not nice. For example, many people say you should never be hanging around with a girl that you wouldn't bring home to Mom. Or, that you should never say anything that you wouldn't say in front of your Mom. My Mom happens to have a very keen sense of what is acceptable and unacceptable, so it's no surprise that KD is one of her favorite athletes. Ask her why and she'll say it's because he's a, "nice boy." I can't speak for every Mom out there, but I think it's safe to say that most Mom's like "nice boys." (By the way, that picture is supposed to be a nice boy... I guess...) I asked my Mom what makes a, "nice boy," and some of the qualifications are: 1) players that keep their mouth's shut, 2) players that keep showboating to a minimum, 3) players that do their job, 4) players that put the team before themselves, and of course 5) players that produce. There are still athletes who attain such qualities, which is why my Mom also loves guys like Jameer Nelson, Placido Polanco, and Larry Fitzgerald. At the same time, we're constantly plagued by players who severely lack these qualities, which is why my Mom can't stand guys like LeBron James, Paul Pierce, and Brett Favre. You might be asking where I'm going with this, and that's where the backpack comes back into play.

I think the backpack is absolute genius. When we see a maturing sports star, we're used to seeing a steady progression towards conceit and arrogance that grows right alongside their growing talent and fame. We've seen Kevin Durant grow and mature immensely on the court over the last couple years, however you wouldn't know it by watching him in a press conference. In fact, you'd think he got lost on his way to math class, especially if he's accompanied by a spectacle-donning Russell Westbrook. As I said before, we're used to athletes becoming more and more cocky and arrogant as their fame grows, however I'm not seeing this with KD. Based on the way he plays, the numbers he puts up, and the money he earns, he could easily get away with being one of the cockiest guys in the league, but he's not. He's about as humble as they come. He's respectful, he smiles, he takes blame when he or his team underachieves, and when he plays spectacular he credits the team. No excuses, no ego - nothing but respect and class, and I think that's exactly why he carries the backpack. It's for the image he's portraying. People look at him, especially when he looks like a nerdy high schooler with his backpack on, and they see a non-threatening kid who just loves to play basketball, and I think that's exactly that he wants them to think. This is why my Mom loves the guy. I mean, have you ever seen Chris Pronger in a press conference? (If you answered no to this question, please click here.) Being a Philly sports fan I love Chris Pronger, and I always find it entertaining when he talks to the media. However, many people dislike the guy because he can be a jerk to the media, and while that isn't always the case it certainly does happen from time to time. Plenty of guys will pull moves like this which isn't the worst thing in the world, but it's always refreshing to see a world class athlete who's extremely humble, genuine, sincere and polite. Plus, when my Mom sees him being interviewed with his backpack buckled across his chest she thinks it's, "absolutely adorable." Not sure that's what he's going for but if he is he's doing a great job.

My Mom and I always joke about how one of these days we're going to find out that KD has been involved in gambling, drug and sex scandals, but until then I'm going to enjoy the guy because at the moment he's one of the most likable guys in sports. And although he supposedly revealed what's in his backpack, I don't think we'll ever know for sure, and I know that because the thing is always buckled up across his chest. I didn't think there was a single person in the world who actually used that buckle, but KD proved me wrong. Looks like the guys got something to hide if he's using that buckle, right? Or maybe he's just cautious - safety first!



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Posted by Kyle Mountain at 10:32 AM
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